A call to intimacy: Once upon a lover

on September 2, 2014


They say looks are deceiving, so she must have deceived me numerous times with her seductiveness, her words of affirmation and deep concern. After all that was what I wanted and she offered it to me on a platter of gold.
That was when my death had begun. The title of the song, ‘killing me softly’ became a reality to me. How would I have known she was a lady in the morning and an astute prostitute at night?
The words of lady wisdom had spoken to me over and over again. But what was wisdom in the presence of pleasure, no matter how short lived? What was common sense in the place of a night of passion? What was sensible thinking in the place of uncontrollable urges?
It started with a thought and then the seed grew in my heart and my actions followed after. I was led astray but at my own will. I knew right from wrong but still made the choice to follow. I thought I was in love…..I thought she had everything I wanted but she could never satisfy my need as I realised probably, maybe life was better off with my first love……
Now I have lost everything. My first love that I had abandoned to chase a life of passion and desires. How had it happened? I thought she was too boring. I was bored and tired of the same ‘ole thing. But now I realize things were much better with her, her consistency in life was of comfort to me; her loyalty and faithful love far more than I could handle. So why had I strayed? Why was the story of the good times now known as ‘once upon a time’? I needed to go back to her, ‘cause she was truly the love of my life. And my only hope now is if she would have me back…..
But then I had also drifted from my true lover; the lover of my soul…. The person who loves me for better, was now a distant thought. How had I come to this place? I’ve had one too many with whom I devoted my attention and care but this one was special and different.
I had lost my devotion and dedication to God and chased after a goddess in a skirt; I lost all focus and drifted further away from Him. The only way back was to retrace my footsteps and go back. And so I did just that, I went back to Him and confessed my sins with a sorrowful heart and asked for His forgiveness. From Him I got the courage to approach my wife of ten years begging and pleading for her to take me back…..

How often we stray from God and place other things highly than Him. The gods of the Old Testament may not be the same ones as now; the money, spouse, fame, sin, our work for God; which could all very well be present day gods. We remember how forgiving and kind He is but sometimes tend to forget we are to fear Him for He is the consuming fire. Gradually, our fear for God dissipates and we are left with nothing. We are left to doing things our own way guided by ourselves.

And when he was in affliction, he besought the LORD his God, and humbled himself greatly before the God of his fathers,
And prayed unto him: and he was intreated of him, and heard his supplication, and brought him again to Jerusalem into his kingdom. Then Manasseh knew that the LORD he was God.

2 Chron 33 vs 12 – 13


One response to “A call to intimacy: Once upon a lover

  1. seton akran says:

    2 things u don’t know what you have until you lose it and not all DAT glitters is gold

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